The wave from a tsunami crashes over a street in Miyako City in an incredible picture taken on Friday but only just released.

So just when things are looking up for me personally, the whole world decides to just go fucking crazy. It’s scary shit that’s happening right now. I woke up this morning to the breaking news in Japan seeing unreal tsunami waves just engulfing land like nothing, taking houses, cars, boats, roads, buldings (everything). It was like that movie The Day After Tomorrow seriously. And now there are fears of a nuclear meltdown in Japan because of the power failures in the region as a result of the 8.9 (HUGE) magnitude quake and tsunami. That shit could just blast all of Asia in one shot. Scary shit.

What else.. A couple weeks back in New Zealand there was that huge earthquake, as well. That town is basically ruined and they’ve already decided to demolish it all because of the extensive damage. Damage and death tolls high.

And we’ve got the wave of revoutions in the Middle East starting with Tunisia following with Egypt and now Libya. Libya is the worst yet. Current dictator is just killing his people with no regard at all and refuses to leave the country despite huge international pressures for him to step-down (well he is willing to leave but only if he can keep his fortunes, I think.. it’s really fucked up –he’s really fucked up). Though attention is on Libya, Egypt still isn’t fixed yet and protests and conflicts are happening between Muslims and Catholics and a bunch of other things. Same for Tunisia, I think. And it is foreseeable that other Middle Eastern countries will follow by example of their neighbours and begin to revolt against their dictorship/authoritarian regimes. It will be violent and many lives will be lost. But it is for the bestI suppose. The purpose of the revolutions have good intentions: overthrow dictator and bring democracy.

It’s really tough right now because the Middle East will need international support and institutional guidance to transition themselves into democracy. This will take its toll on dominant states in the world today because of everything that is happening. Economy is weak in the US, European countries are not very strong either, natural disasters are striking and striking hard.

On top of all this, we have a crazy man Charlie Sheen doing his crazy ass thing with millions of followers. #notwinning.

So, all the problems in my life feel so insignificant right now when I see all the madness happening right now. People say it’s the end of the world in 2012 and with the shit that’s happening now I’m getting kinda scared. I know it won’t happen but I mean, shit what are the odds… I hope everything will get better in time but for right now, there is so much needed to be done in order for the world to get back to normal. Shit is just hitting the fan right now for our world. We’ll see how everything goes.

And last weekend, I went downtown to the UofT St. George to take a placement exam for a study abroad thing in France this coming summer. And, I’ve been told that basically everyone who applies makes it into the program so that’s pretty exciting. I’m practically ready to go for France.

I could be studying here this summer! *_*

However, something has come up… I’ve been informed of summer student job postings at Purdue Pharma (the place I worked like 2 years ago and they paid me crazy good money there). I’ve also been told that once you’ve worked at Purdue for one summer, you are guaranteed a second year of employment there after. So… I’m just like, uhhh “but I’ve made plans for the summer, I’ve got a job with the bank and I’m going to study abroad in France for a month. What the f am I supposed to do?” The problems in my life…. I got it pretty bad #sarcasm.

But again, I gotta realize nothing is certain. So options/possible scenarios:

- Get the job at Purdue: study abroad next year, quit my new job at the bank, BUT make crazy good money
- Don’t get job at Purdue: study abroad this year, take a leave of absence from the bank, BUT be poor

So okay, either way, I think I’ll be fine. Both options are completely fine with me. I must admit, however, that I will be very very disappointed if I don’t get to go to France this summer.  There is always next year, I suppose… OR if a miracle happens and I do get the job at Purdue and they let me go to France for a month that would just be fabuloouuss! I’d work 3/4 months of the summer with them –not bad right?

Oh well, I guess I’ll just have to wait this shit out and see what happens. Should be exciting.

Now… back to work -_- study hard and what not #motivated

So pissed off at life. But now I feel like totally opposite; it’s like I’m a new person!  Anyways.. I’m not mad anymore and I don’t hate everyone and everything. I’m happy with everyone and everything (well for the most part. nothing is ever perfect obviously)

My parents have agreed to assist in funding a summer abroad program in France if I get accepted. I have a new obsession with cooking! I love this shit; cooking is a big de-stressing mm.. activity for me these days. Just today I made sick as fettuccine alfredo with kickass meatballs (with the help of my broham). And I’m getting to be a BAMF (badass motherfucker) at omelettes. I’ma make brunch for my fams this weekend. Should be good!

Also! I’m just hella motivated and interested in everything. I want to do well I want to be successful. Ugh!! I am excited for life and what the future holds. Man, last month was such a piss-off. I’m pretty sure I was unhappy everyday of that month. I legit felt like shit.

Now March is a new month. I’m starting my new job (same position, different location) and I’m back from Reading Week all rested up and shit. Spring is coming soon so no more cold as/cloudy/grey as/snowy days anymore! I can finally shoot around outside and go out for runs at the park and shit. Ughhh yesss!

Soon enough it will be summer vacation And hopefully, if I get accepted to this summer abroad program I’ll be getting 2 university credits in the span of 1 month in FRANCE! Yes, mothafuckin’ France! Just hope I’m not jinxing it by talking about it so much but whatever. If I don’t get it this year, I’ll just apply next year

Anywho! Here’s to a new month and getting over such a shit as/piss off month of February!

(pics of my meals hehehe)

Lately, I’ve been feeling so shit. I’m not motivated to try at anything or care about anything/anyone/myself. Like, it can’t be a good thing if I be thinking like “yo, if my car crashes I don’t give a fxck.. less shit for me to worry about/feel shit about if anything happens to me.” (not like die.. I’m not that emo, but just if I get hurt I wouldn’t care) I was thinking this was just period moodswing bullshit but this is lasting longer than normal so I just have to let these feelings out. Not even trying to get attention but I just need an outlet and I’m too lazy to pick up a pen and literally write this out.

My mom pisses me off, my dad pisses me off, my brother pisses me off, university pisses me off, work pisses me off, friends are whatever, boys piss me off. I’m so fucking bitter about everything. I hate it. I hate everything. I just don’t care about anything… No idea what the hell is going on with me. Theoretically I have everything I really need (who the hell do I think I am to be complaining? whatever.):

- third year university student at a good school
- have a good job at the bank with pretty good pay for a student
- my marks aren’t horrible (70s)
- have friends
- workout, play sports, eat decently
- have clothes, phone, ipod, snowboard, etc..
- i’m not hideous or a stupid bish (I don’t think)

Still pissed off. Mother is a mean control freak, dad is a dumb fool, brother is lazy and selfish. I’m so good to them all but they — more so one of them than the others (we all know who),– insist on restricting the shit out of me and questioning the shit out of me about every fucking little thing I do. What the fuck?! Leave me alone I’m fucking 21 this year. I have never given you fxckers any problems yet you fucking keep me from doing anything I truly like or desire because why? Because I am leaving the house, I’m leaving you? “Oh no.. you don’t know what it’s like until you’re a parent” Fuck that shit. The more you restrict me the more you push me to rebel/want to treat you all like shit. So fucking keep at it and you’ll soon be saying bye to me doing all your shit without complaining.

Fuck everyone. Fuck school. Fuck work.

This had better be a fucking mood swing because I hate feeling like this.

I feel so ugly, so useless, so stupid right now. I couldn’t care less about anything right now. For real, though, I’m not even trying to get attention because when I feel like this I just want to disappear and not trouble anyone with my complaining or negative attitude. But nobody checks my blog anymore so I’m just going to write this here to get it off my chest. There was this picture I saw somewhere on the internet it said: (something like) “I’d rather stay quiet than explain my problems to people that don’t give a fuck”. This is how I feel. Just needed to vent right now.

Tangent:… I think tipping point for this anger in me comes from the fact that my mother isn’t supporting me in studying abroad for a month in France. She’s not going to help me fund the damn thing. And it’s not like OSAP will help me either, these fuckers income get me $0 assistance from the government. Yet, she won’t help me. Acting as if this is a vacation for me that I am doing for shits and giggles. Well fxck you know? I’m getting 2 university credits for this and international experience WHICH looks good on teachers college applications or my resume, so FU. Second, I’m not even asking for you to pay for the whole thing, I just want some help.

She once hated on someone for going away to some third-world country and spent like 5 or 6 thousand dollars on the trip. Saying like “if you’re going to use that much money, at least get something out of it for yourself like in school or work or something.” Yet she is being a hypocrite in not helping me out. This is school related. FU. All the shit I do and the fact I never give you problems with anything and I essentially do everything you want me to do… but you still won’t let me do this one thing. Whatever man.

So that’s it. I feel a bit better to get this off my chest.

Anyways, I go to work.. long and boring. Right after I head over to Cambridge Suites Hotel to meet up with my cousins. I’m hella tired at this point and not really that gassed for clubbing, to be honest. But things start to pick up after we order some swiss chalet up to the room #delish. I take a nice post-dinner/pre-party nap. I’m mad refreshed and ready to gooo! Aight so here’s some pics from this night..

getting ready and shiet

just about ready to head out, man i'm so dark :$

@ lot 332, toronto

Aight so thenn, all hungover and tired after new years eve jamming… We check out the hotel we were at and prepare for our next journey to Niagara Falls for our grandfather’s birthday with the whole family.

We get to the hotel, pretty swag at Hilton Niagara Suites. Can’t lie. Anyways rooms are cool and big so we dig it. I take a nice nap again before we go for dinner with the fams for our gramp’s birthday dinner.

freaky suite hot tub with the creep window

So at dinner, none other than Danny Fernandes is dining at the italian restaurant we were at! He was with some grenades but whatever. We were too chicken shit to holler at mans though –lame. But! when he left the resturant we’re pretty sure that he waved at us. No big deal. What happens after dinner is a random-ass night with my cousins. Clubbing at Dragonfly nightclub #swag, Smoke breaks (and I never smoke), Casino runs (illegally with my cousin), Wiz Khalifa movements in one of our cousin’s suite bathroom (hotbox the shit out of that place!), Fire alarm goes off after we finish, Trip out hard, Run away to casino and grab THE BEST prime-rib sandwiches of life!… Then return back to the hotel and crashhh 5am. Pics….

cousins clubbing together for the first time

hottest bishes at Dragonfly nightclub, Niagara Falls

some chodes hitting on my cousin dani geezy #wheelinggg

No pics from the bathroom session, unfortunately.. #kodakmoment lol. Also, equally disappointing is that I wasn’t sober enough to take a pic of the best prime-rib sandwich I’ve ever tasted ever! #fail

Anyways, we get up next morning/afternoon.. grab some delicious breakfast at IHOP –albiet expensive. Then head back to TO for a next dinner party. Hella tired. Stop at home for a quick shower then back on the road. Dinner delicious.. got home around 11pm ish? Just crashed and woke up like 13 hours later… Pretty solid weekend, I survived

1. Learned to surf in Puerto Rico

2. Fell in love with this lovely sport called “Soccer” or “Football”

3. Got to see a free Metric concert in the city with my bfffl

4. Almost became a flight attendant –what!

5. Celebrated Spain’s World Cup win in the streets with 1000s of fans in TO

6. Went to Panama, saw the Panama Canal –overrateeed!

7. Brought my GPA up from abysmal 2.4 to 3.0. Get at me.
[err, no pic. we don't get report cards in uni anymore]

8. Met a person I met online for the first time –not as sketch as it seems!

9. Bought a new snowboard after 3 years since “the incident”

10. Dated a magician, lmfao. Damn.

well not this gay guy.. but may as well have been criss angel

This post is way long overdue. The trip was in February and I’m just blogging about it now in April… Probably because I don’t want to study for exams. Anywhom here it is:

My best friend and I went on our first ‘real’ trip without the likes of our parents or teachers or coaches. We went to sexy Puerto Rico for our Reading Week vacation in February. It all turned out to be more of an adventure than a vacation really. Now I’ve done the whole all-inclusive thing a million times before (alright maybe not a million, I’m not rich.. but you know..) This was a different kind of trip but it was also the best trip I’ve ever had everr!!

This whole jam was not a smooth ride, however. So Lisa (my best friend) and I show up at the airport nice and (kind of) early for our flight; we check-in and all that. Then we look up at the big board and see our flight is delayed… great. Time passes, its whatever. Then we start getting pissed because we were going to miss our connection flight from Newark to Puerto Rico –mothereffers of Continental! Thenn more time passes and our flight is totally cancelled –son of a bish.

We talk to the Continental bish (can’t lie, she wasn’t a bish but the whole ordeal had me kind of ticked you know) and she says

“okay, we can’t find you another flight with our airline or the others so you’re going to have to take the later flight with everybody else”

We’re super ticked at this time. We were going to miss the connection and then we’d have to call Puerto Rico and re-arrange our hotel, transfers, surf lessons, etc… Also we would lose a day of vacation.

So then Continental Chick says, “because you’re missing your connection we will put you ladies up in a hotel (meal vouchers included) and upgrade you to first class for your flights to Puerto Rico.” –ohhhhh shiiieet! We were no longer pissed. We essentially got a day and night in New York for FREE! I mean, the stresses leading up to this moment were totallyy worth it.

This is why our trip was not the super chill laid-back one we had originally planned. So anyways, we finally arrive in Newark 6 hours later than originally planned. More complications arise. We see the Continental desk and tell them what happened but they tell us that Continental doesn’t put people up in hotels. Lisa and I are like “whatthefuck.. We’re in friggin New Jersey and we were told a hotel would be set up for us. This is bullshit. We’re tired, hungry, and in friggin New Jersey!”

The American Continental bishes were just being bishes, straight up. We went to like 5 different floors to talk to different people, bishes were sending us around in circles. We were finally like “Listen BISH! Look at our frigggin file.” (we didn’t say that but I mean we weren’t the nice young Canadian girls anymore, we had to play the pushy american type)So she says,

“Oh, there you guys are… Yes! We have a hotel for you ladies!” –bish please, we already knew thisss.

So then we got it all straightened out and we finally made it to the hotel. Not bad, yo.

All we do is eat and then sleep. We get up mad early 8 a.m. for our venture into the City (New York City, bishes). We pack up, head back to the airport to leave our luggage at the storage place and we’re on our way to Manhattan! We get there and we don’t give a ff… We tourist up the whole scene. We were in disbelief the whole time. Every few minutes or so either I would or Lisa would say

“holy shit, we’re in New York! What are we even doing heree??!”

I mean we should be on the beach in Puerto Rico right now.. But we’re in Manhattan, for free! Unfortunately, because we didn’t expect to take this side trip we had no winter coats or hats or scarves so we were freezing. We had to buy some coats and scarves to go on, but no big. Whats 60 bucks when we didn’t even have to pay for the hotel or dinner in New York, right.

Anyways, we take plenty of pictures, grab some coffees and walk around everywhere until we have to make our way back to the airport where we’d (finally) catch our flight down to Puerto Rico.

So we get to by-pass all the clowns in coach when checking in our luggage because we’re elite access First Class ladies, thats right. Then we get to board first before the poor souls of coach, too legit to quit! Let me tell you, once you fly first class it’s mad hard to go back to ghetto of coach. Hot towels, a choice between tilapia or steak (I think that’s it.. I don’t know I took tilapia), glasses of wine, warm buns, satelite tv, super roomy seats –hell yeah! Luckily we didn’t have to fly coach flying back to Toronto either, but we’ll get to that later..

We arrive at the Aguadilla International Airport in Puerto Rico at 11 pm and our pick-up is late! Friggin island time… Finally at our stay, Casa Verde Guest House, I check my phone. Of course text messages and missed calls “Where are you? I’m officially worried, etc…” From who else.. My mom -_- I call her and she gets mad at me for not calling sooner. Anyways, story of my life… -_- It’s late and we just go straight to bed again. Next day we have surfing at 9 am.

End of day 1 in Puerto Rico. Surfing was the shit! Kind of like snowboarding. They’re both awesome. Can’t wait until the next time I get to to surfing again! Day is pretty chill after surfing; we grab lunch take a siesta (or a nap) and then grab dinner and drinks at some local spot.

The rest of the trip is pretty much like this. Finally,our relaxing vacation. We’d surf, take lunch, chill on the beach, nap (sometimes), grab dinner, have somedrinks. Throughout the week we went to each nearby restaurant and tried it all. Our favourite spots however were Tapas and the Rockbottom Bar/Grill where we were staying.

Throughout the week we meet sweet people (mostly Americans, specifically from New York, Connecticut, or Jersey-_-), we party with them, and all that good stuff. But the last night is where we had the most fun. There was a band playing at where were staying, the bar was packed, our surf instructor Enda from Ireland came by. Shots all around, $2 drinks, awesome people all around. It was too good.

We didn’t care if we had to be up for 6 a.m. the next morning to catch a flight. We kept drinking and hanging out until maybe like 4-5 am. I have no idea why we did this but one of the New Jersey girls thought it would be a good idea to pour beer from the balcony and catch it in our mouths from the ground floor. Seemed awesome at the time, I can’t lie lol. Looking back… that was a waste of beer. Anyways here’s some of the awesome people we got to hang with.

Good samaritans we went for tacos with at like 1 in the morning

Jerry the big "samoan/puerto rican" security guard

The doctors from New York... or so they say

Endaa! Our awesome surf instructor

There were others but these were the best. Didn’t get a picture with the New Jersey girls because I don’t think our minds were thinking straight at the time. But they were pretty cool. Anyways, we get like an hour of sleep and one of us gets sick –try and guess which one.. We get to the airport and another complication. Because we had the night in New York we took an extra day in Puerto Rico. Lady at the Continental Counter says

“Ahm, you were supposed to leave yesterday.. You are not booked on this flight.”

SO like almost an hour later, calls made, and mad pissed off conversations we’re booked on the damn flight. Also, we’re bumped to first class again. Just sucked because we were super tired/hungover/angry. Anyways, we made it home all good and safe. Can’t wait to ’till next reading week. Most people go with groups of friends or to all-inclusive resorts but I think I prefer trips like these with my best friend. Next reading week, we’re so doing this up again. Then after that EUROPEEE!

link.